Wedding day of Ainaa’s youngest sibling, Yana.
I remember when I received the wedding invitation, I immediately contacted Nad and told her that she must attend this one. Nad being Nad, she didn’t ask much and just went along with it. Nad must have thought I was excited for a small reunion between the three of us, but genuinely, there was a glimpse of hope that I would be seeing you on that day.
Things happened, and clearly, we didn’t talk. I always thought that even if we were not made for each other, I would still pray for your wellbeing, because that’s all I wish for. Then somehow, I stopped mentioning your name in my doa. Perhaps the day I stopped was the day my doa was no longer needed.
I was so occupied that I even forgot to wish you a happy birthday, a date I certainly remember, which was one of the days I looked forward to, as I desperately wanted to talk to you.
Wished you a happy belated one, and that’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.
Time flies by. And finally, D-day.
Nad told me that she would arrive after 14:30. I was okay with it because beggars can’t be choosers, as I asked for her help to carpool and go together. I also thought that arriving late would be fine as we could hangout longer.
13:07 - “Tak datang majlis diorang ke”
No hi or hello, just a direct question that needed a definite answer. You had no idea how happy I was when I received your text. “Well, at least I did cross his mind, didn’t I?” said my defence mechanism.
Arrived at the venue, took a quick look around and figured out you probably weren’t there. Ainaa later told me that your family had left about an hour earlier. I was kind of relieved honestly. I was not ready at all. I felt like I was at my worst state so didn’t want you to see this side of me.
I texted you, and you replied. We talked pretty much the whole time I was there, which was about an hour. It made me really happy and helped ease the awkwardness a bit, especially since Nad came with her husband, so naturally her attention was with him. I completely understood and was perfectly fine with it.
Went home and somehow the conversation ended. Had a mix of affection and annoyance because what was all of that…? I felt like we were having a good time that should not have stopped so suddenly… :/ Maybe it was just me.
Without any hesitation, I told you that I was happy to be on the other end, who received your text first this time. Told you “Jaga diri tau”, hoping that you could sense the depth of my affection for you in my gentle farewell.
You know how people say “kalau dah takde jodoh, duduk sekampung pun takkan jumpa”? I truly felt that. We live close by (I guess), and we even went to the same place on the same day but at a different time. Well I guess if the timing isn’t right, then it just won’t happen. Tak ada jodoh, orang kata.
Semoga yang baik saja untuk awak.
This too shall pass.
