tomodachi

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FINAL: 70 days

MUO: 79 days

those two things are currently on my phone home screen. everytime i see those numbers i get excited because who on earth is not excited when it comes to home right? but finals.... im scared as hell. it frightens me. i just finished my mid term examination and it wasnt easy but i will just surrender everything to Allah the almighty because He knows best (•‾⌣‾•)و ̑̑♡

btw this is just a short post because i dont really have nothing to talk about like seriously nothing interesting happened for now. but let me talk about friends. 

im actually a cheerful and talkative person. i REALLY talk a lot and i think my sense of humor is kind of good??? lol ok. so back in highschool i have quite a lot of friends. i was confessed by a friend of mine saying that some of her friends used to hate me because they thought i was arrogant & so full of myself. but their perceptions about me changed after they got to know me. so yeap. being here, i thought it would be easy to have friends since i got that sociable-kind-of-attitude. but i was wrong. LIKE SO WRONG. 

im not the old Jia. i used to be such a loud person, you could hear my voice 50m away (loljk) but now, im so quiet. when people tried to have conversations with me, i dont know how to make them longer. i have no idea what to talk about. i dont know. this is so not me. i tried to talk more but it doesnt work. especially boys. GUYS IM SO AWKWARD WITH THEM. back in primary school, i was so boyish and i have a lot of boy friends. in highschool, i did have some but we only met during extra classes. after spm ended, i dont have one. ok jk, i do have one. so basically i dont know how should i talk with those boys in my class. yeah i should just be myself but this is not about acting feminine or what, this is about WHAT SHOULD WE TALK ABOUT????? u get me? no? okbye

i get jealous everytime i see my classmates going out. i mean, i also wanna go out with you guys and know you guys better. i also want to joke around with you guys, cursing each other lol just kidding. maybe there's a reason why Allah wont let me to have a lot of friends. it's okay dearself. things will get better by time :)

p/s: i miss divas & ainaa (｡•́︿•̀｡)